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From a Native American Elder...
"It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want
to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your hearts longing.
It doesn't interest me how old
you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your
own sorrow. If you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want
to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.
I want to know
if you can be with joy, mine or your own: if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your
fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human.
It
doesn't interest me if the story you're telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself:
if you can hear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore
be trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty even when it is not pretty every day. I want to know if you can
live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the sliver of the new moon, "Yes!"
It
doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of
grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done for the children (or for yourself).
It
doesn't interest me who you are, how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with
me and not shrink back.
It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains
you from the inside when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself, and if you truly like the
company you keep in the empty moments."
~ Oriah Mountain Dreamer ~
"When we think positively and imagine what we want, we risk disappointment;
when we don't, we ensure it." ...Lana Limpert
A Plea for Community
Don't be fooled
by me. Don't be fooled by the face I wear. For I wear a thousand masks, masks that I am afraid to take off, and none of them
are me. Pretending is an art that's second nature with me, but don't be fooled-for God's sake don't be fooled. I give the
impression that I am secure, that all is sunny and unruffled with me, within as well as without. That confidence is my name
and coolness is my game; that water is calm, and I'm in command, and I need no one. But don't believe me. Please.
My
surface may seem smooth, but my surface is my mask. Beneath this lies no compliance. Beneath dwells the real me in confusion,
in fear, in aloneness, but I hide this, I don't want anybody to know it. I panic at the thought of my weakness and hide behind
a nonchalant, sophisticated facade to help me pretend, to shield me from the glance that knows. But such a glance is precisely
my salvation. My only salvation and I know it. That is, if it's followed by acceptance, if it is followed by Love. It's the
only thing that will assure me of what I can't assure myself--that I am worth something.
But I don't tell you this,
I don't dare. I'm afraid to. I'm afraid your glance will not be followed by acceptance and Love. I'm afraid you will think
less of me,that you'll laugh at me. And your laugh will kill me. I'm afraid that deep down I am nothing, that I'm no good,
and that you will see this and reject me. So I play my game, my desperate game, with a facade of assurance without. And a
trembling child within. And so begins the parade of masks. And my life becomes a front.
I dislike hiding. Honestly!
I dislike the superficial game I'm playing, the phony game. I'd really like to be genuine and spontaneous and me. You've got
to hold out your hand, even when that's the last thing I seem to want. Only you can wipe away from eyes the blank stare of
breathing death. Only you can call me to aliveness. Each time you're kind and gentle and encouraging, each time you try to
understand because you really care, my heart begins to grow wings, very small wings, very feeble wings, but wings. With your
sensitivity and sympathy, and power of understanding, you can breathe life into me. I want you to know that.
I want
you to know how important you are to me, if you choose to. Please choose to. You alone can break down the wall behind which
I tremble; you alone can remove my mask. You alone can release me from my shadow world of panic and uncertainty, from my lonely
person. DO not pass me by. Please... do not pass me by. It will not be easy for you. A long conviction of worthlessness builds
strong walls. The harder you approach me, the blinder I strike back. I fight against the very things I cry out for. But I
am told that Love is stronger that walls, and in this lies hope. Please try to beat down those walls with firm hands, but
with gentle hands--for a child is very sensitive.
Who am I, you may wonder? I am someone you know very well. I am
every man you meet. I am every woman you meet.
"From a Suffocating Man: A Plea for Community"
Author Unknown
They may not deserve forgiveness, but I do.
Anne Paulsen
Forgiveness
is an act, not a feeling. Though it may generate feelings, forgiveness is an exercise of the will. When we forgive,
we refuse to be further damaged by the wrongdoing of others. A refusal to forgive is called a resentment. And the
victim of resentment is always the one who carries it. The people we refuse to forgive may neither know nor care about our
resentment.
To hang on to a resentment is to harbor a thief in the heart. By the minute and the hour, resentment steals
the joy we could treasure now and remember forever. It pilfers our energy to celebrate lifeto face others as messengers of
grace rather than ambassadors of doom. We victimize ourselves when we withhold forgiveness.
Today, I will remember
that forgiveness is a giver and resentment is a taker. Because I deserve it, I will forgive old hurts. I will see forgiveness
as a gift to myself.
The five steps in granting the gift of forgiveness
(according to R. Klimes, PhD) are:
A.
Acknowledge the anger and hurt caused by the clearly identified specific offense(s).
B. Bar revenge and any thought of inflicting
harm as repayment or punishment to the offender.
C. Consider the offender's perspective. Try
to understand his/her attitude and behavior.
D. Decide to accept the hurt without unloading
it on the offender. Passing it back and forth magnifies it.
E. Extend compassion and good will to the offender.
That releases the offended from the offense.
The worst bankrupt is the man who has lost
his enthusiasm. Let a man lose everything in
the world but his enthusiasm
and he will come
through again to success... H. W. Arnold
There is so much good in the worst of us,
And so much bad in the best of us,
That it ill behooves any of us,
To
find fault with the rest of us.... Anonymous
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right. You'll be criticized anyway." ...Eleanor Roosevelt
"Life is like a grindstone - whether it grinds you down or polishes you up depends on what you're made of." ...Author
Unknown
"When we think positively and imagine what we want, we risk disappointment; when
we don't, we ensure it." ...Lana Limpert
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"Anything you can do to me, chances are I do it to myself already, and I hit harder than
you ever could..." --Marya Hornbacker
There is no difference between being
raped
And being pushed down a flight of cement steps
Except that the wounds also bleed inside.
There
is no difference between being raped
And being run over by a truck
Except that afterwards men ask you if you enjoyed
it
There is no difference between being raped
And losing a hand in a mowing machine
Except that doctors don't
want to get involved,
The police wear a knowing smirk,
And in small towns you become a veteran whore.
There
is no difference between being raped
And being bitten on the ankle by a rattlesnake
Except that people ask if your
skirt was short
And why were you out alone anyhow.
There is no difference between being raped
And going head
first through a windshield
Except that afterward you are afraid
Not of cars
But of half the human race
---Marge
Piercy
Twenty-four long years on this earth,
and still no one knows how much it hurts.
I
keep the awful truth hidden inside,
as I let friends pass me by.
Feeling distant and feeling spaced,
no longer
part of the human race.
Where is that girl I used to know,
where did all her strength go?
One night and
one mistake,
how much abuse do I need to take?
Even though he isn't here,
I can still feel his breath on my
ear.
All the awful things he said,
bounce around inside my head.
When will I let people in,
and realize
it's not my sin?
My prayer at night is always the same,
that during the night I will finally die of shame.
All
I want is one person to understand,
to talk to me and hold my hand.
Instead I sit here with my tears,
fearful
of the next twenty-four years.
My friends don't like the way I act,
but I can't bring the old me back.
Until
I can deal with the past,
no relationship can last.
So I must try to open up,
and trust my friends to pick
me up.
So a promise to myself today,
I will find a better way.
Whenever confronted by a tyrant, tormentor, teacher, friend or foe (they all mean the same thing)
remind yourself, "This moment is as it should be." Whatever relationships you have attracted in your life
at this moment are precisely the ones you need in your life at this moment. There is a hidden meaning behind all events, and
this hidden meaning is serving your own evolution... Deepak Chopra
"Life begets life. Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich." - Sarah Bernhardt
Life Purpose
We are all put on this earth for a purpose. This purpose is
one that each individual alone must fulfill in order for humanity to move to the next level. It is within your contract that
you entered into before this life that you will fulfill your purpose in this life. The longer we wait, the longer the whole
of humanity will wait for deliverance. This purpose is often times the thing that many people yearn to do, but often times,
do not know where to look, where to even start, to find their perfect "job." This is not found in the classified advertisements
in the Sunday paper or through that expensive private education. These methods may be temporarily satisfying, however, unless
you are following the call of your heart, chances are, you will eventually become restless and look for something better.
The something better is within. It is within your heart, where you would least expect it. It is not what you have learned
over many years and have grown to like, it is not something that you have to learn. Instead, it is something that you discovered
during your childhood, or sometime in your past. It is the part of you that brings you joy. Perhaps its the love of trains
that you have relegated to the basement of life or an interest in bugs that you decided was weird because of peer pressure.
It may be something that you do and do not appreciate as a gift or something you feel anyone can do. Search within, find the
love within and it will be obvious to you like a bright beacon of warm light on the coldest darkest winter day.
For
many, in order to recognize our purpose we must overcome what we see as our own inadequacies. It may not be something we can
touch, perhaps it may be more like an idea or a feeling. It may be related to a tragic experience that we had or something
that we feel has been done to us. It may be a feeling of utter helplessness, we may feel forsaken because of something that
we feel we can not control. We may feel that we must help others to regain something in their lives, but what? It may be something
within ourselves that we must accept and love as a part of our whole in order to gain an understanding of who we really are.
We alone are the only ones who can fulfill our own contracts. It may be our deepest fears, our deepest hatreds, our most critical
judgments of ourselves or others. Our self loathing and judgment is what keeps most of us from fulfilling our life purpose
and is also what is blanketing us from the divine within ourselves. This is what we must overcome and recognize, accept as
part of ourselves and teach others that which we have learned.
Whatever we believe about ourselves will manifest.
If we believe we are stupid and dont deserve to make a great salary, sure enough, we will be seen as stupid and will make
next to nothing. If we believe we are fat and ugly and nobody could possibly love us... guess what. On the other hand, if
we believe in our hearts that we are strong and intelligent and deserve the best in life, we will get exactly what we deserve.
This is the power of thought. It is up to all of us to recognize that we are so very loved and have exactly the right tools
to succeed beyond our wildest imaginations. Together, we will awaken to a higher consciousness and will recognize that we
are all perfect. It is up to each of us individually to find our own purpose. Nobody can find it for us and hand it to us.
There may be times when we revert to our old thoughts, but we wont forget totally what we truly are. Once we recognize
who we truly are, each time we forget, it will be easier for us to remember again that we are perfect and whole until we forget
no more. We are all one spirit, Divine spirit. We are all of one mind and therefore, all of our thoughts affect each other.
When we judge ourselves harshly, we hurt everyone. We are all children of the one reality, God.
The process of self
acceptance does not come after years of working out in the gym or a Ph.D. in Nuclear Physics. You could go through all the
work of physically or mentally exercising your muscles and still feel inadequate. You must believe it within your heart, unconditionally,
that you are perfect just the way you are. This may take years of digging for some or it may take a moment, this depends upon
the individual and how resistant the soul is to finding true happiness. This will seem frightening to most as we uncover parts
of ourselves that we may not truly accept, however, once we have walked the tightrope and found that we have gotten to the
other side safely, the exuberance that we feel will be like no feeling we have ever felt before.
The longest journey of any person is the journey inward... Dag Hammerskjvld
The Trouble Tree
I hired a carpenter to help me restore an old farmhouse, and after he had just finished a rough
first day on the job...a flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric saw quit...and now his ancient pickup truck
refused to start. While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence. On arriving, he invited me in to meet his family. As we
walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching tips of the branches with his hands.
When
opening the door, he underwent an amazing transformation. His tanned face was wreathed in smiles and he hugged his two small
children and gave his wife a kiss. Afterward he walked me to the car. We passed the tree and my curiosity got the better of
me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier.
"Oh, that's my trouble tree," he replied. "I
know I can't help having troubles on the job and in my life, but one thing's for sure, troubles don't belong in the house
with my wife and the children. So I just hang them up on the tree every night when I come home. Then in the morning I pick
them up again."
"Funny thing is," he smiled, "when I come out in the morning to pick 'em up,
there aren't nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before."
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